tasha

2011-01-06T23:05:00.000+08:00

It's gonna be a new year soon.. A fresh start. A fresh page.

2010-12-28T01:36:00.002+08:00

I'm really scared. Paranoid. And everything's not right to me right now. I've been really an ass. I want to run away from myself. I'm going for a run this weekend.

Just for a minute, no responsibilities hanging over me. No harm done by me. Nothing.

Just for a second, I feel like I am the only one ruling the world.

2010-12-11T01:14:00.002+08:00

I'm gonna meet babe tmr after work and we're gonna go fishing. Im so excited! XD

2010-12-07T21:55:00.001+08:00

No one else in my arms but you, babe.

2010-12-02T04:05:00.002+08:00

and i miss you sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo muchhh.. :(

After December, I'll start to work lesser and start living young.

2010-12-02T03:53:00.002+08:00

Babe will be enlisting soon most probably around march? Ugh. Now, I dread everytime I look into my organiser cause it just keeps reminding me how close it's gonna be till march! And finally it's about time I will actually experience how it's gonna be like when your boyfriend's away serving the nation. I've always been trying to dismiss this fact.. :(

And to TOP it all, as the year is going to the end and 2011 coming, I get more nervous than ever! It means I'll be restarting school and I've to make new friends! I think I suck at meeting new people. I just hate the first awkward small talks part.. And I'll be way older than them. I mean I won't know how their frequency is going to be like.. I met seventeens and sixteens at work and.. it's just different.. I am socially-doomed.

Someone returned my wallet. The pink one. Nice of him. Even though he took my 140 cash and left the remaining 10 inside.. Very thoughtful. But I'm thankful anyway.

OMG. Work is starting in less than 4 hours and I'm not asleep. I shall go sleep. I need sleep.

2010-11-25T00:33:00.002+08:00

It has been so long since I touched this keyboard.

I lost my wallet. Twice. I'm taking a break from work this weekend. I'm listening to Katy P's Firework. God I love that song. It certainly brings me up whenever I'm down.

'Baby you're a firework!'

tomorrow is the release of danish's PSLE results. I'm freaking nervous.

2010-11-05T21:57:00.002+08:00

Will you be Mine,

today & forever?

At work, I made a 2-tier wedding cake. The first base was all chocolate and chocolate rum&cherry for the top. While I was piping the cake, I realised I am doing my first own wedding cake. Lol.

Ultimate awesomeness.

2010-11-04T23:18:00.002+08:00

I guess when I fall, I fall really hard.

2010-11-04T22:03:00.005+08:00

I'm screaming inside of me.

HELL

FUCKING

CRAZILY

MISSING YOU,

BABE..

2010-11-04T00:53:00.002+08:00

a guy with intelligence
a perfect gentleman
damn ol' skool. brings back such memories!

2010-11-03T22:45:00.001+08:00

When I was a lot younger, I don't mind being alone. I would just do my own things by myself. Kept myself happy and preoccupied with my own colourings and work. I wouldn't really consider myself a loner cause I did have quite a number of close friends. It's just that I realised now, that then, I preferred to do things alone. It was this point of time when I was my own bestest friend.

2010-11-01T23:04:00.001+08:00

2010-10-28T00:27:00.002+08:00

Take a bullet through my brain;
Yes I would die for you baby

But you won't do the same

2010-10-28T00:21:00.000+08:00

I just want to be alone. Period.

2010-10-27T23:59:00.002+08:00

2 more days. Let's do this.

- - - -

I am not entirely sure if this is what I need or should get when life gets a better hold of you? Maybe then, it's what you don't need.

2010-10-25T20:36:00.002+08:00

I had a horrible monday..

I need a lift

2010-10-24T01:43:00.000+08:00

2010-10-24T01:13:00.002+08:00

A good teh tarik. I've always loved the teh tarik at Prata Paradise. Even Sargu agrees. It has this flowery hint to it.

2010-10-20T02:01:00.001+08:00

Sometimes I keep it cool
Sometimes I let 'em knowsometimes I even pack my bags to walk out the door
Sometimes I feel safe
Sometimes I really dont
Sometimes I promise that im ready to let 'em gooobut I dont ever wanna leave 'em alone
They say im brain washedbut im in love with this man (ooooh)

2010-10-19T12:12:00.000+08:00

Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one, I still got the seed

You're like an Indian Summer in the middle of winter

Like a hard candy with a surprise center

2010-10-19T12:10:00.001+08:00

I am scared.

2010-10-19T10:40:00.002+08:00

I'll be starting work in a few hours' time. Shall make myself some eggs.

2010-10-19T01:22:00.002+08:00

Walking the streets with you and your worn out jeans

I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be

Laughing on the park bench,

Thinking to myself

'Hey isn't this easy?'

2010-10-19T01:09:00.002+08:00

& there I was, thinking to myself.

Take me, Take me away. Come away, Come away with me. Where we can be.

And that brought me all the way down through memories. Of how it was. And how it came about.

For the longest time ever, I felt free. And alone.

2010-10-14T02:03:00.002+08:00

I gotta take a little time

A little time to think things over

I better read between the lines

In case I need it when I'm older

I wanna know what love is

I want you to show me

I wanna feel what love is

I know you can show me..

2010-10-13T00:49:00.002+08:00

I'll be heading to the salty winds this weekend.

2010-10-12T01:39:00.000+08:00

2010-10-11T04:20:00.003+08:00

Haha. Came across this old video when I used to be in TP. Despite the harsh moments, ITAS is a memorable place I have to admit.

2010-10-11T01:54:00.003+08:00

I love keeping memories alive. I have this thing for nostalgic moments. My knees would go weak and I'd just be filled with love, instantly. Knowing how we have grown, the people you meet, the people you grow up with; everything. Tucked in safely with you. There are just so many stories for each of the photos.

I feel that being with someone you love keeps you alive. Be it family, friends or someone special. I guess everybody wants to be loved and knowing there's always this comfort zone you can snug into whenever life is just getting a better hold of you. A place you feel safe, secure and at home.

2010-10-11T01:51:00.000+08:00

I want to bring him back home. Please?

2010-10-11T00:42:00.005+08:00

You are right.

We have another 243930 years to go.

So let time unravel our friendship.

For starters.

Hello, I'm Natasha. & I enjoy life's simplest pleasures.

2010-10-11T00:00:00.003+08:00

I just had caffeine. And I'm wide awake! I think it's most probably cause I can't wait for work tomorrow. I'm excited for work. Lol.

I'm feeling quite myself now.. and for the past few days, in fact. I think this is what I needed. Time for myself. What my girlfriend said is true. We don't have to travel far just to reconnect with yourself. For myself, I enjoy doing things alone. I've been hiding behind my comfort zone for too long. I enjoy being flexible. I enjoy spending time alone at cafes and libraries. I enjoy just having my usuals accompanied with a good book or just something to work on at a cafe, occasionally watching people as they go by. I enjoy going to the beach alone. I enjoy spoiling myself with chocolates and desserts. I enjoy having lunch alone. I enjoy shopping alone. I enjoy doing my own groceries. I'm having a relationship with myself. I am in total control of myself.

I enjoy meeting new people and making plans with them. I enjoy not having to feel restricted and controlled.

I don't get torn apart with many different opinions. I hear - only myself. I heard myself.

I saw myself. You gave me that chance. So, thank you =)

hugs & kisses.

2010-10-09T01:44:00.003+08:00

I want to do this. I think I finally know why I've been feeling so empty inside. I want to do this.

2010-10-08T02:03:00.002+08:00

Today.

For a really long time. I couldn't hold it in anymore longer

& I broke down

infront of Sargu

2010-10-08T00:57:00.004+08:00

Bila Cinta kini

Tak lagi bermakna

Yang ku rasa kini

Hanyalah nestapa

Ditinggalkan cinta masa lalu

Dulu kau tawarkan manisnya janjimu

Yang ku sambut itu

Dengan segala hatiku

Hingga engkau pergi tinggalkan ku

Ku sebut namamu di setiap doaku

Bangkitkan setiap kenangan tentangmu

Yang ku dapat hanyalah bayangmu

2010-10-07T13:14:00.001+08:00

Her voice is amazing and dreamy.

2010-10-07T04:59:00.001+08:00

I will be strong. I'll wait. For you. For us.

2010-10-07T00:14:00.011+08:00

Heading to Hidden Gems for food hunting with Afiq was awesome.

First, to Astons for some meat. I had Hickory BBQ Chicken with their coleslaw and mashed potatoes. I know I like their mash potatoes even though I couldn't get to finish them. Afiq had Black Pepper Steak with garden vegs and mashed potatoes. The food was alright I guess. Its just filling enough for lunch. Was expecting the place to be crowded? But it wasn't. So, it's good it's not crowded. Even so, we agreed that the food is Not that impressive. But I think maybe we didn't try their signatures. I am considering to give this place another chance to change my mind.

Hickory BBQ Chicken

After That, to Pave. This chocolate boutique shop is the cutest I swear! Ive always had my eyes on it ever since it starts to open. It's all so pink and doll-house-ish. We tried the Tiramisu, Nutty Putty and the Mon Cheri Tea.

NUTTY PUTTY

Tiramisu

Afiq thinks the tiramisu would be nicer if the cake's thinner? And I had a mixed feeling about the Nutty Putty. The coconut mousse was nice at first but it got quite a bit too much after a while. I think I wanna try the others one day again. Pave - will definitely come back.

Mon Cheri Tea :)

After that was to Awfully Chocolate. LOL. :) It turns out that it's not that bad to dine in there actually. The place does have a nice setting. Hmm. Never realised that before. Had the Frangipani Pear Slice? & Afiq had his Salmon&Cheese Tart ( I think it's cheese, is it?) & latte. My slice was nice at first with the pears but after a while it got too much once I had all the pears. Hmm. But it's alright overall.. Next time - should try the banana cream pie.

Mooshi's Pear Slice

Visited EWF (must tries are Nutella Tart, Banana Butterscotch, Tandoori Chicken) as well as Puteri Mas (durian puffs. As testified by a taxi uncle). But didnt get anything there. Our stomachs needed a break for a while though. Haha.

Next, to East Coast. Wanted to go lagoon. (Must tries: Stingray, Gong-gongs, Satay) But considering the distance, we reconsidered. LOL. Too much food already and our stomachs were pulling us down.

(& now, I'm hungry back again)

- - - - - - -

It amazes me how small the world really is. And at the same time, impossibly vast and amazing.

- - - - - - -

And my answer to the question I asked? It is strength. And all the amazing seemingly impossible things and sacrifices you'd find yourself doing under the name of love. It is the most blessed feeling anyone could ever have. It is painful when it's real. It gets toughened after every overcame obstacle. It's an addiction we Man can never stop succumbing to. You'd feel you're superhuman. You'd feel you're the air, the earth and the wind. You'd put the person you love before yourself. It is perseverence. It is faith. It is trust. It is hope. All In all, love makes you a whole complete Person.

Food hunt was fun, girlfriend.

It's different for a change.

And it's really good :)

2010-10-02T22:42:00.003+08:00

I am never gone from you. I am always here. Have always been here from far. I love you.

2010-10-02T02:29:00.000+08:00

I've decided.

I'm gonna kick this off alone.

2010-10-02T02:15:00.002+08:00

Under a lover's sky

I'm gonna be with you

And no one's gonna be around

If you think that you won't fall

Well just wait until

Til' the Sun goes down

Underneath the starlight, starlight

There's a magical feeling so right

It'll steal your heart tonight

You can try to resist

Try to hide from my kiss

But you know

You know that you can't fight the moonlight, no

You can't fight it

It's gonna get to your heart

2010-09-29T23:20:00.004+08:00

With one condition.

You have to promise you won't fall in love with me.

classic.

2010-09-29T23:03:00.002+08:00

She's all laid up in bed with a broken heart,
While I'm drinking jack all alone in my local bar,
And we don't know how,
How we got in to this mad situation,
Only doing things out frustration,
Trying to make it work but man these times are hard,

She needs me now but I can't seem to find a time,
I've got a new job now on the unemployment line,
And we don't know how,
How we got into this mess is it God's test,
Someone help us cause we're doing our best,
Trying to make it work but man these times are hard

But we're gonna start by
Drinking old cheap bottles of wine,
Sit talking up all night,
Saying things we haven't for a while
A while yeah
We're smiling but we're close tears,
Even after all these years,
We just now got the feeling that we're meeting
for the first time

2010-09-26T03:23:00.006+08:00

As I'm sitting here, I could still see faint glimpses of us. Do you remember? I'll be in your grey sweater, feeling ever so safe, warm and secure. I love it. It's so huge on me if I wear it, I could really hug myself. I've always loved how silly I looked in it, cos it belongs to you.

Armed with hot chocolate, we would just talk endlessly throughout till the night howls and our worried parents calling us up. Our books witnessing our first light innocent flirtings; as I twist & play with my hair always trying to keep my cool. It felt so good to just fall in love, all over again.

On the nights when you were already on the way to meet your boys, just because I was sad n said I needed to talk, you flew straight to my place.. Under the night sky, we star gazed as I lay beside you. We just spent all night talking. Saying things we both feel. And I felt secure.

You would just whisk me away and sit up talking on the breakwater with me in my pyjamas and uncombed hair. And I never felt so beautiful.

Both of us unsure what's stirring inside of us.

I remember how we used to always argue when we started as friends. I mean, you have always been this addictive cocaine. It's insane. The more I argue with you, the more I cannot stand not to. I have to be near you. I have to argue with you. And as much as I know how you used to really irritate me, the more I realise I have to be with you. And back then, no matter how much we tried to kill each other, I know I can always just talk to you anytime I want.

But things are different now. We can't really expect the innocence to last forever. I guess we have surpassed that stage. We are growing now. As an individual and a couple. I know it's like the whole world's against us to be together. And we have our other responsibilities and priorities to settle first. This is tough. But I love you way too much. The rest now, is how we are going to make this work.

Babe, I still love you despite the fact you tripped me infront of the whole cohort outside auditorium WHICH actually made me burst out laughing instead of being angry with you. And Dayah thought I went looney for a while there.

I never stopped hugging your sweater whenever I go to sleep.

I miss you.

2010-09-26T02:54:00.001+08:00

"A day without you is like a Year without rain"

2010-09-24T14:38:00.001+08:00

I'll be heading down to the salty winds soon. It has been long since it was just you & I, tasha.

2010-09-20T05:45:00.000+08:00

"Simple questions that can't be answered.

One thing I learned is that over these 19 years, I've grown into a living contradiction. Confident yet insecure and frail. Ever ready to believe yet distrustful of else. Conservative yet open. Optimistic yet pessimistic. Near yet far. I can just laugh and cry in a split second. Sometimes I show myself & then I'd just run and hide. It's a turmoil inside. I'm a hypocrite to my own. I give reasons to why it should be when I know it shouldn't. Too uncertain. I can just be on either sides at just any point of time. I have 2 of me. One of them moulded from the years. My heart is cold. Yet my love for you is tremendous, babe. It is a constant war within battling for space and the right of way. It's impossible to read 'cause I've the opinions of both about everything. So every single day, every single thing I do contradicts myself in a way or another. "

-28/1/2010

2010-09-19T02:07:00.003+08:00

I'm gonna start my running day soon. omg im excited already.

2010-09-18T13:14:00.004+08:00

Tonight, I met an interesting person; Nor Afiq.

It is indeed a small world.

And it never fail to amuse me :)

2010-09-16T23:11:00.000+08:00

I guess no boy can ever be like Tristan from Stardust.

2010-09-16T22:09:00.000+08:00

2010-09-16T22:06:00.000+08:00

2010-09-15T01:02:00.001+08:00

I don't know what to say or do anymore.

2010-09-12T02:22:00.002+08:00

I don't know if I can take this anymore. I'll fade away if that is what you want. And again, I know you will never read this. Maybe perhaps you forgot my url or you're too busy or you don't bother to. Who am I kidding. I'm not needed. If I'm the only person in the whole world (or at least the people that should matter to you) you're actually trying to avoid or rather not see, then I guess the problem lies in me.

2010-09-12T01:29:00.000+08:00

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
That's alright because I like the way it hurts

2010-09-12T01:23:00.000+08:00

2010-09-06T05:04:00.002+08:00

For this love, I wanna run and collide with you.

I'd go against the world if I must.

For this love, which you and me belong.

2010-09-06T03:35:00.007+08:00

It's freaking 3:35 am right now and (for the obvious) I'm still not asleep.

Not exaggerating but I can feel my body tiring out and I think I can feel eyebags forming under my eyes right now! But my mind wouldn't let me sleep. FY MIND. I NEED TO SLEEP. PLEASE.

------------------------------------

I know I won't be able to say the right words to comfort or make you smile. I know (especially for the first few days) that I've been saying or asking just really stupid plain duh questions. I was scared. I was shocked. And it pained me real, real bad to see you hurt. When I rushed down, it was then I realised I shouldn't be seen. So I hid. For that whole time - I was so confused. I didn't know what I should do. So I was just there - standing and watching.

When I saw you that night, all I wanted to do was just run towards you and hug you so tight. And babe, I was wishing so bad, trying to squeeze out soft encouraging words just like how normally people would say but I just couldn't. I know there was nothing I could say. And I hated myself for not saying anything. I couldn't figure anything out to say to you cause all I could remember that night was your eyes. Your eyes were telling it all. And you kept strong.

And I was quiet. Notice how when I am not there with you the number of msgs I sent was more than what I actually spoke to you in person for that whole 3 days. When I see you, all I want to do is just - sit there beside you.

literally just sit there beside you.

At first, I thought by keeping conversations with you flowing would at least help something because I couldn't bear the idea of being idle hence the incessant questions and talkings but then I know the one thing I should do is to just - stop talking.

If I'm being quiet it doesn't mean I've given up on you. It doesn't mean I'm pissed or annoyed at you. I am simply just waiting for you. And in my silence, there is this immense admiration for your strength. And through your strength, it gives me strength as well. You are a responsible, loving, strong young man I've always love. I know even if the world turn its back on you, you'd hold your head high and stride on. That is just how you are. And Babe, how I wish I could tell you how you really inspired me.

But sometimes, please don't carry the whole world on your shoulders. Even superman needs help at times.. And I want you to fall on me.. And here I am, I will be waiting. I want to take you away. I really badly want to take all your pain away. So I really just want to hug and cover you from any hurt or pain. I want to be that jelly-like substance that can bounce bullets off.. or kevlar. I want to be your shield, your armour, your saviour. I want to protect you. From anything else.

I love you so much. And every single day my love for you keeps on growing. From the second I woke up to the last before I sleep, you have always been there constant in my mind. You are a constant in my life.

I really cannot wait till I could see you once more again.

My love, my strength, my Everything.

I love you, always have and always will do.

2010-09-06T03:34:00.001+08:00

How to make friends with an Introvert

1. If you must drag them to a party, please don’t abandon them. Don’t go rushing off to catch up with your other friends without including the introvert; the inny will die in a corner.

2. If they actually call and want to talk, listen! These moments may not come often, since Innies usually work out their problems within their own brains, but that does not mean they are all Bella Swan “suffer in silence” types.

3. Realize that they do want to be alone sometimes. They may have gone to that party, and even enjoyed it, but they burn out faster than you and need time to recharge alone. The assumption that all introverts are shy really bugs me. This is not always the case. They can be charming, tell jokes, and generally be the life of the party…but for a limited time only.

4. Skip the small talk. Introverts are reflective beings and enjoy conversations about feelings and debating things like the ontological argument, and whatever interests they have. They can only tolerate chitchat with people they just met or haven’t seen for awhile. If you must tell them your entire jam-packed weekend in detail, check your inny friend for signs of consciousness periodically.

5. Introverts don’t hate people. They just find them tiring.

6. Introverts are socially aware. Yes, we are well-versed in social nuances, customs, and mannerisms; we just don’t implement them as frequently as extroverts do.

2010-09-06T00:31:00.000+08:00

2010-09-05T21:15:00.002+08:00

Yep. Still do.

2010-09-05T21:15:00.001+08:00

2010-09-05T20:53:00.001+08:00

I have to re-establish this again. Just cause I was listening to Katy P's.

2010-09-05T20:52:00.000+08:00

The most important thing is not to win but to take part, just
as the most important thing in life is not the triumph
but the struggle. The essential thing is not to have conquered
but to have fought well.

-Demetrius Vikelas

2010-09-05T20:35:00.000+08:00

Thanks to them. This is how I've been spending my time on TV.

2010-09-05T03:01:00.005+08:00

PSLE IS COMING!!!!!!!! And I'm extremely nervous. I think I've been pushing my tutees alot for the recent lessons. But hell. NOT ENOUGH!

On another note. I received presents for Teacher's Day. Haha. Awesome-ly cute, I swear.

- - -

Aidilfitri is coming. And I've yet gotten my raya clothes, accessories, shoes etc. I don't know. Geylang is a pain in the ass. It's so hard to move anywhere! And I don't understand why some people insist on bringing prams to Geylang where it's almost impossible for anyone to have a proper walking stride. It's like you have to take extremely small steps just to move. Especially the ones near Joo Chiat & Paya Lebar there - it is exactly like a Highway. When you're in the highway, you just got to keep walking straight baby. If you stop in the middle of the highway to peer into the shops, you will create a massive jam behind you. And somehow, you can hear the cursings of minah/mat reps. Lol. If not for the food and food and.. yes more food, I'd definitely not mind not stepping to geylang.

Speaking of which, I am getting myself siput sedut, fried cockles, ban mian (only sargu knows where's my favourite ban mian!), vanilla milkshake, SUSHI, SUSHI, SUSHI, Double McSpicy, Masala Dosai, DURIAAAANNNNSSSSSS, Caramel Frap (with extra caramel, please!), and oh my god the list will never end ONCE Hari Raya is over. Haha. By then, I'll resume working as per normal and having some days to myself.

I know I am a foodie person. I eat alot and it's never-ending. I can eat, eat, eat, munch and eat the whole day. And maybe my metabolism is a major saviour but this I know will not last long. So therefore, I SHALL START KEEPING MYSELF FIT AND HEALTHY. So.. I shall wait after I'm done with my food list and Hari Raya, then I'll be setting aside one day per week for me to head down to East Coast to exercise etc. Haha. K AWESOME LET'S GO.

I WANNA BE SEXY AND MUSCULAR!!!

K goodnight. I love you

2010-09-05T02:34:00.002+08:00

2010 Ramadhan's a breeze yet filled with set of circumstances always proving our patience, love and faith.

2010-08-31T00:07:00.002+08:00

Being able to just feel your warmth is like a dream from the Heavens above.

I miss you so.

2010-08-30T02:24:00.002+08:00

Salty winds, soon.

2010-08-30T02:06:00.002+08:00

OHMYGOD I MISS HIM SO MUCH I CANT SLEEP

2010-08-30T01:50:00.002+08:00

I want to be your strength.

I want to provide you warmth and protect you from the pain.

I need to save you from danger and not let you be hurt again.

Cause a good man is hard to come by.

2010-08-25T21:13:00.000+08:00

2010-08-23T11:43:00.000+08:00

It's clear. I'll never be good enough.

2010-08-22T18:59:00.002+08:00

You are and have always been the strong person I love.

2010-08-20T21:41:00.001+08:00

The boyfriend & I are really really good. He's definitely the reason why I look forward to new mornings lunch dinner warm, warm hugs and sweet, sweet night dreams. How things are, we'd definitely go through it together. Yes we will. What's gonna be - no one knows. Although how terrifying it may be. But I know one thing. And that is - as we grow in the rain, summer, will Always bloom for us at the end of the day.

- 19/03/2010

2010-08-19T23:28:00.000+08:00

"As I grow to understand life less and less,
I learn to love it more and more"

2010-08-19T23:23:00.002+08:00

And me and you belong

Oh, I wanna run, smash into you
I'm willing to run, smash into you
I'm willing to run and run, and run, and run, ooh
I'm ready to run and run, and run, and run, ooh

And I wanna run, run, smash into you
I'm willing to run, run, smash into you.

Always had and always will do.

2010-07-13T00:48:00.001+08:00

2010-06-29T14:21:00.000+08:00

2010-06-29T00:44:00.002+08:00

I had 2 cups of Hot chocolate today.. Mmmm.. The alluring seduction of cocoa.

and that reminds me of Puasa.. Puasa is coming.. So it means - DengDeng! or halal babi? - you know what I mean. haha. Besides that, I want ayam percik, and that thick honey which you can only lick off from the chopsticks. Cause if u bite on it (or maybe it's just for my brace case), it'll get stuck in between your teeth and you'll have a hard time getting it out. Oh trust me babe, getting food that's stuck in your mouth out is no easy shake leg. I know. Ask the bracey. Anyhoo, Just the thought of the food - it's driving me crazy! And I'm hungry all over again.

I got a phone back. I swear having no phone makes me feel so damn detached from the world.

I'm not working in swensen's anymore so I'm pretty free except for when it comes to giving tuitions. But hell - the head is filling up the list-to-do already!
1) Nasi Ayam Penyet
2) Briyani
3) Sushi
4) Cycle/ roller blade
5) Swimming
6) Gong-gong/Siput Sedut
7) Fishing
8) RETURN MY OVERDUE BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Damn. The NLB can be my personal loan shark. I keep on forgetting to return them on time. Bloody hell. GO TO SLEEP AND GO TO LIBRARY TOMORROW TASHA!

2010-06-17T01:36:00.002+08:00

im walking out that door.

2010-06-15T23:25:00.002+08:00

I am in a huge dilemma! I think I need to draw out the pros and cons on a HUGE piece of paper regarding the poly courses. I am like fucking nervous yet extremely excited - it's unbearable I swear. Anyway, I'm uncontactable again. So just either express or snail-mails!

2010-05-31T02:16:00.001+08:00

I don't want to do with anything anymore.

2010-05-31T01:55:00.000+08:00

Picture perfect memories,
Scattered all around the floor.
Reaching for the phone cause, I cant fight it anymore.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind.
For me it happens all the time.

Its a quarter after one, Im all alone and I need you now.
Said I wouldnt come, but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I dont know how I can do without, I just need you now.

- - - - - - - - - - -

SALTY WINDS. I NEED YOU NOW PLEASE

2010-05-27T02:25:00.002+08:00

its for his own good. and i will forget it all. cos at the end of the day it all won't matter. its for his own good.

2010-05-27T01:19:00.000+08:00

2010-05-19T23:43:00.001+08:00

- - - - - - - -

2010-05-15T00:30:00.001+08:00

Thousand roses isolated and everybody knows
We cry, we try, try to get it together for sure
And still well rise, like air we'll rise

Sugar, sugar, I was dreaming last night bout you
Wrapped up in real talk I will not lose
But still we'll rise, still we'll rise
like air we'll rise

Outlandish - Feels Like Saving the World.

2010-05-12T02:10:00.001+08:00

I will reward myself tomorrow.

2010-05-12T00:39:00.000+08:00

2010-05-09T22:31:00.000+08:00

2010-05-08T15:44:00.000+08:00

You by the light
Is the greatest find
In a world full wrong you're the thing that's right
Finally made it through the lonely to the other side

You said it again, my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark,
And I'm in love and I'm terrified.
For the first time in the last time
In my only life.

2010-05-07T01:53:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday Dha dearest!

love you lots baby. Always and forever.

This is why we are still strong.
Nothing else but simply just us.

loved&loves.

- photo credits:
Haikal
Nazry

2010-04-29T12:42:00.002+08:00

Selena Gomez - Naturally

- - -

"You are the thunder and I am the lightning
And I love the way you
Know who you are and to me it's exciting
When you know it's meant to be

Everything comes naturally, it comes naturally
When you're with me baby
Everything comes naturally, it comes naturally

When we collide sparks fly
When you look in my eyes
It takes my breath away"

2010-04-19T22:20:00.002+08:00

I think I'll be heading to the salty winds very soon enough. Or at least after the music. So there will be something to keep me company. This year is going to pass real fast for me for I'll be a dead working zombie for the next few months or so. And after that, it shall be my long long awaited vacation!

Things are slow; now. Everything seem to be rather flat. It is like you can actually feel the problems they are facing from their blank eyes. It is just too stale. In the day, all the smiles are up and the voice shielding the eyes. But at the end of each day as we step to the front gate and unlock the door, we'd find ourselves seeking for the things that would warm our feet. perhaps a hot chocolate or a smooth drink to soothe the mind. because you don't have time for self-pity. you don't have time for any reason to trouble your worn out body. distract yourself so you can have a good rest. and tomorrow will be another day yet again.

- - - -

Well, we are never alone.

- - - - - - -

Cat Power - Maybe Not

Did I mention I LOVE cat power? Totally AWE-SOME!

2010-04-10T23:27:00.000+08:00

Happy 20th Birthday dude. :))

2010-04-02T13:29:00.001+08:00

WORK WORK WORK WORK WHEN WILL THE DAY FINALLY COOOOOOOOOOOMMMEEEEEE..

2010-03-31T21:57:00.001+08:00

MISS U hahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

2010-03-29T23:39:00.002+08:00

I don't know if I can ever do it.

The roots are calling us deeper every time. Pulling us into the Earth, through the soil and to its core. Setting our strength to fire eating its way through even the littlest of strand we are holding on to. The thing is; it's the same Sun we depend on for light and warmth, the same water we drink to satisfy our thirst and the same soil our feet are stepping on, where our tears land, bearing our footprints and where we, all, will return to one day. Be it different we grow as plants, we still belong to the soil. Our roots crept deeper through the earth. Why the differences, discriminations and classifications when we are One when we die?

Is the world above ground cursed? Everyone deserve a chance to prove themselves. It's not easy being labelled and judged just so you seemed - like that..

But then the world is too old and too many mistakes are made and too many wounds unhealed; scars remain till this day. All I want is a chance to be accepted.

For a heart, I've to break a heart. & One heart I will never and never want to break is - a Mother's heart.